1. N. T. Wright doesn’t parse nouns. They decline themselves before him.
2. When James Dunn came up with the New Perspective, it was already old to N. T. Wright.
3. N. T. Wright doesn’t baptize infants. He sprinkles the hell out of them.
4. Dead theologians sit around and read books about N. T. Wright.
5. The Trinity isn’t a mystery to N. T. Wright.
6. N. T. Wright doesn’t read books. He stares at them until he gets the information he wants.
7. N. T. Wright once preached all night in an upper room. No one fell asleep.
8. Instead of playing crossword puzzles during breakfast, N. T. Wright solves New Testament manuscript variances.
9. N. T. Wright knows the Adamic tongue. But he only uses it to order take out.
10. N. T. Wright makes purple the most masculine color.
11. N. T. Wright is actually the guy Paul is talking about in 2 Corinthians 12.
12. N.T. Wright is only bald because his hair got too scared of his brain.
The objective, according to Jesus, was not to get people inside of heaven, but to get heaven inside of people. An understanding of the gospel that concerns itself only with getting my own soul into heaven – damn this world, it’s all going to burn anyway – falls miserably short of the revolutionary message of Jesus. Jesus did not come to live in your heart like an imaginary friend. He came to bring you into the kingdom that you might be a part of God’s communal ministry of justice, grace, and mercy.
—Ronnie McBrayer (via hislivingpoetry)